Wedding Procedures

Do you know how it feels like, when you know your about to marry and your just stuck thinking what's to do next... well for me... that' what i felt.. along with the blues of thinking that the future groom is not doing a single thing... and the fact that these procedure is getting a lil complicated, now that i'm already a muslim... blur case adi...

So yeah.. if you guys wanna know how the whole procedure works for a 'muallaf' meaning a new convert... this is how it goes.

Adam and i had to attend this 2 day course called the 'Khursus Kahwin' aka Marriage Course, that was one of the criteria... Alhamdullilah.. though the schedule is really long, out of the 6, 4 ustad's manage to make their talk interesting and funny... (yes u can never have the class more attentive if you don't add jokes in). They will have light refreshments prepared for you.. and that was when i had the experience to where the 'tudung' aka the head scarf for 2 straight days... hmmm...

So we got our certs within a weeks time... the next thing is to do a HIV test in any government clinics... This one i have to share some experience with all of you. We went to the nearest government clinic... guess what, they make you read a silly pamphlet on HIV.. after 5-10 minutes, they will call you in... and it's question and answer time (it's ridiculous by the way)... so the nurse will ask on and on.. at the end i asked her "Is it compulsory for everyone to go through this" guess what's her reply "that's what the doctor instructed us to do"... hmm... ok so yeah they pull out this stringer from this plastic and they poke your finger.. to get the blood tested...

Your asked to wait outside, and within 10 minutes time you need to go to another room to get the results... so the thing was both Adam and i went to separate rooms... so i was like "Eh.. how come ah?"... he came out first and the results was negative for him.. than it was my turn.. went in.. the doctor said "congratulations, your tested negative for HIV" (by the way the letter from the doctor is only valid for 6 months - coz u have to submit it with your marriage application). So i got out of the room and i just had to do this.. i put up a sour face.. and started shaking my head from left to right...

Adam: "Da.. Da.. what is it... what did the results say...?"
Me : *still shaking my head*
Adam: "Da, tell me......" (his facial experience beginning to change)
Me: *started smiling* "hahahaha.... it's negativelah... why so scared..."
Adam: "Da.. don't do that to me again ok... you almost scared me there""

HAhaha.... i know i'm so wicked... but it was just so fun making him worried sometimes.. i know bad girl....

So few weeks later we had to see the commisioner of oath.. to certify that we are both bachelors and we have not committed in any marriage previously. Photocopy of IC... and other things... Next stop was JAWI (a government Muslim body in KL).. to submit our application... we met with the Ustad.. due to the fact that there are no close relative of mine from the father's side that are muslim.. i need to get a 'Wali Hakim' - a representative that will give my hand in marriage to my future husband during the nikah.

He prepared a letter and instructed us to go to the Syariah Court to get the consent of the court in order for me to get a 'wali hakim'... we went over.. and later found out that we need to photocopy all our documents... meet a typist so that he/she is able to draft out a certain piece of document (forgot the freaking term), that will be read during the court proceeding. Manage to get a slot the week after, in order for us to proceed with the wedding plans fast...

When the day came by.. u guys will never know how 'kan cheong' aka nervous i was... i thought i had to stand in front of the huge court or something.. but guess what.. i was called into this small room... was told to take my sit.. in front of me is.. the judge... next to him is the typist.. and all the judge did was:-

Judge: What's your full name?
Me: Alisha Melissa Mah Siew Kheng
Judge: Where do you live?
Me: (read out the full address)
Judge: When did you convert and where?
Me: 12 December 2008 at JAWI
Judge: Is your future spouse name Adam Fong Sho Keong?
Me: Yes Sir...

Well of course it didn't end there... there were a few more questions to go and the end was:-

Judge: The syariah court hereby allow Alisha Melissa Mah Siew Kheng to apply for a 'wali hakim'.... dismis... (huh... stun... blur face adi... quickly look at the guy that brought me in) Sign language he told me can go out adi... once out of the courtroom i asked:-

Me: It's just that ah?... nothing else?
Guy: *smiles* yeah... that's all.. you can go back to the administration office and wait for the letter...

You couldn't believe my reaction... i was so stun... i didn't expect the court to adjourn that soon... though i'm totally grateful that everything went smoothly... so yup.. we got our letter.. went back to submit the letter... the ustad dakwah and interview us a bit.. the next thing we know our application went through and we had to make a payment of RM25 for processing.

Next blog... wedding plans

Hmmmm....

I guess my previous post is just plain brief and very straight forward. The truth is, i wish i could spill every single beans that happen during the period of time that i had to go through.. but i just feel that it's not so safe anymore, when your blog is being read publicly. Those who are close to me, would know the exact thing that happen to me... but i guess certain things are better to be kept confidential.

So yes, as to how i actually encountered Islam, it is through the boyfriend (now the husband)... he decided to be a muslim in March 08... due to his decision.. we had a lot of quarrel and you would never have guess how many attempts we had on quitting this relationship. I thank Allah that we survive every single test.. and we stayed strong till today. I guessed one of the most hurtful thing i have ever said to my future spouse was "I will never marry a muslim".... and that broke his heart so much... that he cried. I guessed i better eat those words back... hahaha...

So yeah... umm... i had to lie to my parents that i was still a Catholic when i was actually not... yes i did the most hurtful thing in the world... that is to do all this behind their back.. and it's not like i didn't have any guilt in me.. i did... i have the sense of empathy in me.. what do u think.. i can't just ignore my parents feeling... but i had to do what's right for me.. and that is to make my life happier.


Things were not going smoothyly through out the journey... the hardship and tourment i had to go through... when i wanted to marry the man i love and my mum still holding on to me, without knowing that i was already a muslim... i couldn't bear telling her.

And all this while... Adam and i were planning for our wedding... hmmm...